Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
