How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize