You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
I'm too high and old for this...
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Randomize
