If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
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