I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Randomize
