Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Randomize
