Buhtt sex?
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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