Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
last night I used snow as a chaser
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
