I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
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