I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
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