Plan B is the new Plan A
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
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