The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
there is glitter all over my balls
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