Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
Dicks are not precious.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Randomize
