Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
