I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
Randomize