I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
this will be a night to untag.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Randomize
