No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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