There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize