Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize
