Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.