what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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