how can u be prego again
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
