I like my sex mixed with concussions.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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