Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
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How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
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YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.