Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
