Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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