ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
no more duck duck goose at the bar
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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