well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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