Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Randomize