My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Randomize