I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
