I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize