garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
