Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
