You made me cry and you don't even care
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
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