Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
