I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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