After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
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