Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
