i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
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