and i looked up. we had an audience...
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
