so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
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