But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
