I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Randomize
