Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
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How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
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COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .