Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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