I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
