considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
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