I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Randomize
