Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
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