Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
